Thursday, March 13, 2014

Well, hello Ms. Lady...

What's this!?   Could it be....another post from the most awesome blog there ever was!?  Well, no not really.  It's just our big dumb blog again.  I know that our tens of readers may be slightly less annoyed today due to this post.

Welp, wasn't expecting that!
Well, big news...Malia and I are expecting again!  It was really on a whim that Malia decided to do the ol' pee on a stick test, but man am I glad she did!

I was busting her chops a little, thinking that she was being overly dramatic with the whole "Ugh, my boobs are really sore and swollen and I'm really tired..." bit.  I mean for crying out loud, I'm tired and my boobs hurt too...

One quick trip to Safeway and a potty break later quickly shut my mouth.  Side note - don't ever try and buy a pregnancy test at the ghetto Safeway close to our house.  Apparently, there is a highly sophisticated theft ring that specializes in home pregnancy tests...  It's so bad, they have to lock them up in the manager's a safe...behind a locked door...  :|  Clearblue Easy my ass.  So there I was - up in the front of the store by the manager's office...just me, the manager, assistant manager and the customer service guy all trying to pick the most appropriate stick to pee on.  Good times.

I digress...did I mention that we are pregnant?

That was just about a month ago, so we've had some time for the idea of another screaming bundle of joy/stress/poop/vomit to settle in.  We had our first appointment with our OB doctor today, the same doc that delivered Sydney!  Mom and baby are doing fine and are just shy of 9 weeks today!

We'll be starting to post belly pics again as soon as there is something to show...  I had to give Sydney her notice on the crib today.  I'm surprised she has stayed in it as long as she has, but we're definitely keeping her in there as long as we can!!

Ah man, I just replaced the blankets in here!

Stay tuned!

Tuesday, May 24, 2011

Only 8 weeks left...

Only 8 or so more weeks to go before little Sydney joins us!  It seemed like it has been this far off thing that would seem to take forever to get her, but here we are...almost there!

Malia has been feeling pretty good this last week, although she is starting to have trouble sleeping now.  She has to get up to use the bathroom several times a night now.  It seems as though she likes to tap dance on her Mom's bladder...little turd :) 
So true...
Sydney has been getting the hiccups a lot lately; getting that diaphragm nice and strong for that first breath.  We had a very minor freak out the first few times that we felt her doing it...we had no idea that it was the hiccups.  Naturally, our thoughts went to the worst imaginable scenarios...our kid had nervous tics or something else equally terrible. Well, all I can say is thank god for Google.  One quick search and our fears of having a handicapped child were abated.

Our next doctors appointment is on Thursday at the Womens Center where we'll be delivering.  We have reached the stage where our OB doc wants to see us ever two weeks now instead of every month, so there's no question that we are getting closer to the end!

 Its finally starting to warm up here...we even cracked 70 degrees last Friday, a literal heat wave.  We started taking the dogs down to the lake that we live close to to get our handi-capable Jax some much needed swimming exercise on his knee.  We found a nice little beachy spot that is secluded enough that we can let the dogs run loose and retrieve sticks and stuff.  I really like that we can walk down there from the house in less than 10 minutes.  I'm going to join them in the water once it warms up a little   Jax went bananas today, as usual, trying to chase a duck.  He almost got out to the middle of the lake today trying to get it.  He was really committed, you could see him literally pulling himself out of the water he was swimming so hard.  Such a special little guy...

F you pollen!
The warm weather has sent all the plant life into freaking pollen overdrive.  I've got pretty bad seasonal allergies, but this year is ridiculous...its almost debilitating its so bad this year.  I've even resorted to using a neti pot to try and help alleviate the symptoms.  Boy, what a weird sensation that thing is.  If you're not familiar with the neti, you basically pour warm saltwater up your nose and throughout your sinuses to flush everything out.  Yep, you heard me right.  You pour saltwater right into your face...and yes, it feels as weird as you think it would.  Its helping a little though, I think.

Mowing the grass has become quite the chore now.  I have to suit up in long sleeves, pants, dust mask and goggles to keep from going into anaphylactic shock.  I think I'm better protected than most guys working with the damn Ebola virus.  Just the other day, I had the bright idea that if I took a benadryl before I went out to mow, then I wouldn't be bothered as badly...  I found out why they put those warning labels on the know, the ones that say something to the tune of "Don't operate heavy machinery".  Now, I know you're all thinking: "Zack, lawn mowers aren't really considered heavy machinery.  Its more like hefty machinery"  Trust me, I'm with ya on that one but I had one helluva time finishing the front yard.  It was all I could do to will my legs forward.  The bad thing was that it didn't really even help that much...

Friday, May 13, 2011

Cereal Nazi!

Well, we’ve had quite the week with 3 different doctor’s appointments.  Two were for the gestational diabeetus and the other was just our normal monthly visit to see our OB doc.  Speaking of which, we’re now at the stage where we need to go see him every two weeks instead of the every month schedule that we had before.  All the more evidence that she’ll soon be here!  Also on that note, our doc updated our due date back to July 12th now.  So mark yer calendar!

The doctor’s appointments went well.  The first was with a dietician who went over Malia’s food intake and blood sugar levels for the past couple of weeks.  She is doing really well!  The dietician was pretty surprised to see that Malia had been getting away with eating some of the stuff that she had been.  The second one with the diabeetus nurse was not as fun.  She kept harping on Malia about how eating cereal was “probably the worst thing you could be eating right now…”  Blah blah, whatever.  Her blood sugar is doing just fine eating that cereal, so I don’t see what the big deal is.  All I could think about as the nurse blathered on about how bad cereal is was of the Soup Nazi from Seinfeld.   “No Cereal for you!”

No, not this Extreme

Now, I’m not saying that she hasn’t made some poor choices in food…  She’s been trying to drink more water but, you know….water is BORING.  So, to make it a little more interesting we got some of those Crystal Light mixers.  Well, we neglected to read the label very carefully because we actually bought the “Energy” kind which has as much caffeine in it as, oh I don’t know: a friggin’ Monster Energy Drink.  Crystal Light….it’s EXTREME!   Seriously, this crap had more caffeine in it than a goddamn Red Bull…WTF?

Well, Malia had to find this out the hard way by drinking a boatload of the stuff before realizing what it was.  By then, it was too late…the damage had been done.  Keep in mind that she has been a saint and kicked the caffeine monkey cold turkey as soon as she found out she was preggers and hasn’t really touched the stuff since.  Well, she just accidentally dosed her and little Syd pretty good.  She had the caffeine shakes and everything. 

The most interesting part came later that evening when all of that jittery goodness made its way down to Sydney…  That kid went. Freaking. Nuts.  I swear, you could see her doing somersaults in there.  She must’ve been doing cartwheels or something…it was crazy.  We could even make out her outline on Malia’s belly, like she was trying to kick her way out and take on the world!  Now I’m worried that we’ve created some little crackhead baby addict; our own little Tyrone.  I’m sure that I’m going to catch her one of these days snorting Pixie Sticks in her closet.  If you don’t know what Pixie Sticks are, it’s basically the kid equivalent of doing Heroine…so, suffice it to say that it’s really, really bad.  I’ve always joked with Malia that this was our “starter” kid.  She’s going to be messed up…for sure.  We’ll have another one and maybe do it right from all the messed up stuff that have done to her.  If it’s a boy, maybe we’ll name him Mulligan.

Monday, May 2, 2011

29 weeks

Me: "So, you're gonna do this pic in jammies, huh?"
Malia: "You're damn right I am."

Sorry for the long stretch between postings...I'm sure our tens of readers have been waiting with eager anticipation.  Well, the last couple of weeks have been pretty busy for us, leaving me virtually no time to get all bloggy.

Malia has been feeling well despite having been recently diagnosed with gestational diabetes last week.  She barely squeaked in over the limit on 2 out of her 4 blood glucose tests, which technically means that she has it.  From what we've been able to learn on our own and through our doctor, it seems to be the most common ailment of pregnant women and isn't at all serious if looked after properly.  Malia's sister, Faith, had it with her last two kids so we weren't surprised when the tests came back that Malia had it as well.  Bye bye Ben & Jerry' least for now!

Yes Wilford, we got our diabeetus supplies
from Liberty Medical

We went to an appointment with a dietitian and got the ins and outs of controlling her blood sugar through diet and Malia got a nifty blood sugar monitor.  The dietitian seemed pretty impressed with our diet that we have already and we were both relieved to learn that there wasn't going to be all that much we had to change.  She was mostly bummed to find out that she couldn't eat all the fruit she could get her hands on anymore.  Apparently, that stuff is like kryptonite to diabetics.  So far, that's been the biggest pain in the ass about this...that and she has to remember to check her blood sugar after she eats.  I don't really think she is all that diabetic as most all of her readings are coming out on the low end of the range so far.

See Dad, it even has windows!
My Dad & step-mom, Lisa came up from S. Mississippi to visit a couple of weeks ago.  We had a great time hanging out with them while we could.  It kind of sucked because neither Malia nor I could take any time off from work while they were here.  We're both saving as much vacation time as possible for when little Sydney gets here in July.  They weren't put off by it at all though...those guys didn't really even need us to be here at all!  They had their rental car and a GPS and took off.  I think the main reason Dad wanted to come up was to make sure that we weren't living in some shanty on the other side of the tracks in squalor.  This being his first grandchild coupled with that he hadn't seen my new house had him a little worried, I think.

We went out to the Skagit Valley Tulip festival and showed them the spectacle that is the tourist trap of LaConner on a sunny weekend.  I think they had a good time, but you can only see so many fields full of flowers and antique shops before they all start to look alike.  I think Lisa was able to get some good ideas and inspiration from the local shops for her pottery, though.  I had fun learning more about how to use the new camera.  That thing is pretty amazing!  I have some more pics on my Flickr site if you're interested.

They also, very generously, took us down to Ikea and bought us some much needed furniture for the baby.  This being their first time, Lisa had a great time looking at all the trendy, very European, stuff that Ikea is famous for.  Dad was a good sport, too.  He and I had a good time making fun of all the retarded Swedish names for everything...

It was a weird strip club, OK?
Don't judge me.

We have a couple of other major events on our plate last week of having both the bachelor and bachelorette parties for our friends, Ron & Mindy.  I was in charge of the bachelor party so I made sure that there was plenty of food, booze, music and that we met the obligatory bachelor party boobie quota.  I grilled some steaks up here at the house and then we piled into a rented Yukon to see some live music downtown....and then of course: the strip club.

I could hardly watch these girls on the stage without thinking about being a dad to a little girl soon... It reminded me of the Chris Rock bit:
"Your only job as a father to a daughter...the only job.. is to keep her off the pole!"

Malia was in charge of the bachelorette party and all I know about it was that it was at the notorious local gay bar, "Neighbors".  There was lots of freakiness to be had by all.  Malia did relay that even with all the freaks walking around in full body PVC gimp suits, everyone was looking at the pregnant lady as if she was the one that was weird...whatever.

Monday, April 11, 2011

26 weeks

This was the only shot without "Spirit Fingers"
Only 12 more weeks, give or take, until we're somebody's parents!  Weird, huh?  Well, it is for me at least.  I had a glimpse into the future today as I sat in the waiting room at my dentists office.  There was a guy, maybe 24, with a tiny little infant.  She couldn't have been more than a couple of weeks old because she was sooo small.  Mom must have been in the back getting her dental work done while Dad was left in the waiting room with the little girl.  Well, the little one must have finally realized that Mom wasn't around because she totally lost it and began wailing to no end.  Nothing he did was rocking, swaddling...nothing.  You could see the look of sheer fucking panic on his face as he looked around the room and then down the hallway...he had no idea what to do with this screeching pile of pissed off baby.  Mom finally got done and came up front and grabbed the little one and she instantly stopped crying.  I can only imagine what that guy was thinking.  It must have been a mix of both relief and anger.  What a little asshole!   That...that is going to be me...I can see it coming.

Anyway, Malia is feeling well so far.  She has been having some trouble sleeping lately so we went to Babies "R" Us circus on Sunday and got her a pregnancy body pillow, so hopefully that helps.  Also, she has to go back in for a re-test for her gestational diabetes test.  Something happened on the first test and they need to do it over again.  This time she has to fast for 24 hours, which seems like a pretty cruel thing to do to a 6 month pregnant lady.

She was a happy child, really.

Its looking like we've finally made a decision on the name.  I think the thing that sealed the deal is my run-in with a little red headed 8 year old girl at the hair salon the other day:  As I was waiting for my turn to get a haircut, I noticed this particular little girl because she has a spooky resemblance to Malia when she was that age.  I was trying to not be too "creepy bearded guy" about staring but I couldn't help but think that I was getting a preview of what was to come.When her Mom called "Sidney, come over here honey."  I was taken aback... You see, Sidney is the name that Malia and I have been pretty sure about for a few weeks now.  This just erased any doubt in my mind that I had about this name.  Must've been a sign, so Sidney it is!  Still working on the middle name, but the really important one is in the can.

We've also been starting to play little Sidney some music in-utero.  I tried to make mine mellow and calming so I picked lots of really peaceful music that gives me goosebumps.  I figure that's good enough of a criteria...  Malia's consists of Dead Milkmen and a couple other songs.  She was disappointed when I told her that Pantera was definitely not gonna happen.  I put together a playlist you can see here.  I'm up for suggestions too, so shoot me an email or something.

She either hates it, or loves it.  We can't decide which one becasue she goes crazy whenever we play it for her.  I'm going with the ieda that she loves it...nothing scientific, but thats what I'm sticking with.  I'm also picking back up my guitar to learn some songs to play for her once she gets here.  I've farted around with the guitar off and on for years now.  I know just enough to know how much I suck at playing the guitar.  It's fun trying to learn some Beatles songs though.

I finally returned some underwear that I tried to buy for Malia a couple of weeks ago.  You see, I was trying to be a really nice & thoughtful husband and get her some new underwear at Fred Meyer when I heard her complain about how her old ones don't fit her anymore.  So, I go to Fred Meyer (I needed socks too. It wasn't like I was just going shopping for panties.) and walk in woefully unprepared for the huge selection of womens underwear...  You see, I'm used to the very simple choices that I have to make regarding my own underwear. 1st choice - Boxers or Briefs, 2nd choice - Size: S, M, L, XL...etc.  Done.  Easy as pie.

I now know that womens underwear not only comes in 30 different styles and sub-genres, but the size...oh the sizes.  No such thing as small, medium or large, oh no!  Much to easy that way.  I had to totally guess what size to pick based off of my prior shopping trips with Malia.  As far as cut?  Well, I tried to logically think it out: "What would be the most comfortable and supportive for her...she is pregnant after all."  OK, the bigger granny ones would be great!  She won't care, she's pregnant!

Feeling a bit weird about buying panties, I bury it amongst other much more manly things like tools, camping gear and some motor oil.  Now that I think back on it, that checker must have been really confused: Tools, camping gear, motor oil and womens underwear...  In my attempt to not look like a weirdo, I think I achieved the opposite most successfully.

I triumphantly make my way to the house to deliver my most thoughtful of gifts to the pregnant one only to be thoroughly disappointed in her response:

Me:     "Hey babe, I remember you complaining about your underwear the other day so I picked you  
            up a  package while I was out."
Malia: "Oh wow, that was very (opens bag) sweeeeet of you....  What the f*ck is this?"
Me:    "I know its super granny, but hey...they'll be super comfortable!"
Malia: "Yeaaaah, I'm not wearing these.  Are you crazy or something?  (Looks over package) How big, 
            exactly do you think I am?  These are HUGE!"
Me:    "Uh, I don't know....I just guessed.  Thats close to your size of jeans isn't it?"
Malia: "Uh, no.  Not, not even close."
Me:    "Oh....I'll take them back."

So there I was on Sunday: In the return line at Fred Meyer, panties in hand.  I'm just lucky it wasn't the same cashier.

Wednesday, April 6, 2011

25 weeks and counting...

Sorry for the late post this week...I've been feeling rather non-motivated to do much of anything lately.  It doesn't help that this week has been particularly busy either.  Not that its been all that busy, I'm just a lazy ass and anything outside of going to work and coming home to watch Star Trek: The Next Generation reruns leaves me completely exhausted and a bit cranky.

Malia is feeling well so far, although she'd beginning to outgrow the new shirts we bought just a week or two ago.  The little one is not so little anymore either... She's gotten a lot more active, too.  When she gets in a mood, we can actually see her doing somersaults in there.  Very weird, but very cool at the same time.

We go to the doctor again on Friday for our monthly checkup, but as far as we can tell everything is looking good!  I think the doctor wanted to screen Malia for gestational diabetes on this visit, but again, everything is going swell so far.

I have to apologize about the poll.  It doesn't seem to be working and I can't figure out why.  I'll try to get it fixed soon and maybe even add an option to submit your own name suggestion for our little bundle o' joy.  I'm split at the moment between Bathsheba and Jermajesty...

This last Friday, April 1st, was our 7th wedding anniversary.  I wanted to make it really special since Malia is pregnant, so I bought us tickets to Teatro ZinZanni which is a crazy dinner-circus-theater-show thing. Now, if you live in the Seattle area and haven't done this yet, do yourself a favor and put this on your to-do list.  The food was great and the show was even better.  Our faces hurt afterwards from laughing the whole time.  Its pricey, but worth it.

A camera so awesome, it takes its own picture.

We got a new toy this last weekend, too: A Nikon D90.  I've been a bit of a photography nerd for some time and have had a couple of really nice film SLR cameras, but nothing this nice in the world of digital.  I got a smoking deal on it through craigslist to boot.  I was a little leery about carrying that much cash to meet some jerkwad from the interwebs, so I made sure we met in a very busy Starbucks on a Sunday morning in Kirkland. All went well and I got myself and my shiny new gadget home safely.  It's been fun learning how to use it, but its gonna take me awhile to master the damn thing.  Its got submenus of submenus of submenus of options, settings and other customizable wizbangs.  Oh, and its heavy, too.  Heavy means good in electronics, right?

Spring is definitely here.  It hit me as I was outside on Sunday, mowing the grass with a jacket on...  Now, I grew up in the South where there are two seasons: Hot and Not-So-Hot.  So I thought the idea of mowing with a jacket on was pretty damn funny considering I grew up having a heat stroke while mowing.  We finally got the shed organized, too.  That thing has looked like the aftermath of a lawn & garden center explosion ever since we got it.  The funny thing is that it only took 1 Saturday's worth of time and about $60 to get it organized.  Must be all those Star Trek reruns...

$4 a gallon? That means I can have gold plated lavatory!
I got to take a super cool tour of the Everett main
plant on Tuesday with one of my old coworkers
from Kenmore Air.  He got a job there as a Manufacturing Engineer about 3 months before I did!  He took me on one of the infamous 787's being built right now.  I know that it is made from mostly composites, but I was really surprised how much of the airplane was composite.  Pretty much the whole damn airplane, with the exceptions of some high stress parts and the engines, of course.  Next, we went over to see the massive new 747-800 Intercontinental.  That thing is seriously freaking huge.  I wish I could have taken pictures to show you guys because it was really pretty impressive to think that that thing actually flies.  The one we saw happened to be one being built for a member of the Saudi royal family.  It was getting decked out with a wicked custom interior: showers, hot tub, bowling name it.  The base price for the airplane alone without engines and interior is around $380 million......  Just remember that next time you fill up you gas tank.

Monday, March 28, 2011

6 months

Well, here we are...six months down, three more to go.  It's funny, Malia used to really hate doing these pictures but now I think she's actually starting to enjoy it.  She way to stubborn to ever admit that I may have actually been right, though.  The little one is really starting to move around quite a bit now.  It's gotten to the point to where I can feel her doing cartwheels, or whatever the hell she does in there, at night if Malia snuggles up to me in bed.  I don't even have to try to feel it anymore, its pretty obvious.  I can't imagine how she sleeps with that circus going on in there.  Must be payback for all the flashlight torture we dished out earlier.

We're still haven't picked a name yet.  If you look over to your right, you'll see that we've narrowed it down to a few of the top contenders for you to vote on.  I figure what better way to make one of the most important parenting decisions than to let the fine citizens of the interwebs decide!  I only wish that we had beat that couple that auctioned the rights away to naming their baby on ebay to the punch.  We could have a a cute little RC Delco running around, in addition to a few bucks for Mom & Dad's vacation fund!  Oh well, maybe next time...

Speaking of crazy, Malia has been inundated with crazy baby ladies (or CBL's as I call them) lately.  You know what I'm talking about; those random strangers, and not-so-strangers, that feel like its OK to touch her because she's pregnant...  Malia is just waiting for the next lady that does it.  She's already got it all worked out:

"Well, I never!"

CBL:  "Oooh, look at you!" (puts hand on Malia's belly)
Malia: (Immediately puts her hand on CBL's belly)
CBL:  (Startled) "Wha, wha, what are you doing?"
Malia: "Yeah, weird isn't it?"

I hope I'm there to see will be awesome.

What could go wrong?

Also, we're already looking into daycare... Apparently you have to start looking several months before you baby is born.  Funny thing, turns out daycare costs like a million dollars a second...yay! There goes all that "extra" money we thought we might have.  It's too bad that you can't just lock your kid in the backyard while you're at work.  She'd have the dogs to keep her company, so she at least wouldn't be lonely.

In other news, Jax the handi-capable junkie dog is doing quite well.  We've weened him off of the hard stuff and now he's getting back to somewhat normal.  He gets the staples out this Saturday which is a big deal.  I offered to do it myself with my new office scorpion, but Malia thought that it was a bad idea...I'll have to admit that think she may be right on that one.

Other than that, it was a pretty slow week for us here... Malia went back to work after a week of dog sitting, and boy was she ever excited about that!  My new job is going pretty well.  It's turning out to be much more complicated than I had originally thought, which is a good thing because it won't get boring.  I'm just still the new guy which sucks because it seems that I'm asking a question every couple of minutes.  I'll figure it out soon though.